One of the first things that I do when I begin the breakup process is call up one of my exes. (If you try this tactic as a means to make yourself feel better while going through a breakup, which I do, it is VERY important to note that the ex you dial up should be one that YOU broke up with, and not the other way around).
This particular "ex" is a great fun-loving guy who while he may not adore me, always answers my calls and is ready to hang out. For me, he falls into that category of a guy a dated for a a few months, never quite made it to the boyfriend-girlfriend status, but now that we're not seeing eachother anymore it's much easier to just call him my ex-boyfriend rather than explain the whole situtaion like I just did. (You know what I mean, right?)
He is a whole lot of fun, has a bunch of friends with boats (yay summer suntan!), but ultimately I have already been down this road and know that he is not "one of the ones" for me. (sigh).
Bachelor #2: The Ex-Neighbor
I randomly ran into one of my old neighbors two weeks ago @ Epoch coffee on North Loop. (After I had just snagged an AMAZING 3-piece vintage luggage set for $10 at Blue Velvet, so I was already in a great mood.) I had always thought he was super good-looking but I also always seemed to run into him when I was looking less than my best (aka taking the dog for a walk whilst super hungover in the morning), so I just figured we weren't meant to be. :)
We caught up for a few minutes, updating eachother on the health of our respective puppies, he shocked the heck outta me by asking me out for a drink! I told him I was glad he asked and immediately accepted.
After two consecutive Tuesday night dates, I think I have realized that the "romantic potential" isn't quite there. I may go out on a third date just to test my theory, but I'm pretty sure my instincts are right on this one. (I'll keep you posted).
Bachelor #3: Someone Else's Ex
Oh jeez! At first, this guy had the most potential...we met at the Robert Plant show last Monday @ Stubb's. He was good-looking and nice and clearly he has good taste in music. We chatted and flirted and exchanged phone numbers. He called me Tuesday and asked me out!
First red flag:
Him: "The movie is at 7, why don't you come meet me at my place and we can go from there?"
Me: Parking downtown kinda sucks, why don't you just come get me since I am on the way?
Him: Okay, where do you live?
Me: In Clarksville (gave him my address).
Him: Oh, I used to live in Clarksville with my ex, she still lives there.
(okay no big thing, except it came out later that after a 5-year "on and off" relationship, they have only been broken up for 2 months. I know, I know, who am I to judge? I am only 1 month out. Yet, notice that I do not talk about him on first dates...which seems pretty obvious.)
We went to the Alamo Drafthouse to see a movie, he ordered a pitcher of beer.
Second red flag:
Me: I think I am really in the mood for a sandwich
Him: Do you want to split a pizza?
(I'm confused, was he just totally not listening to me, or being cheap? See red flag #3)
He ordered another pitcher of beer. Toward the end of the movie the check arrives.
Third Red Flag:
Me: Do you want to split it? (obviously asking out of pure politeness)
Him: yeah.
(...really? I am not trying to be ridiculous here, but I only offered because I know it is the polite thing to do. You can't expect a man to pay, that is taking advantage right? But come on, any guy I am going to take seriously would NEVER have taken me up on that offer.)
Later that evening...we managed to catch a surprise set from Alpha Rev @ The Parish. He and I are both musicians so I mused... "Isn't this the kind of band you would love to be in?" His response: "Nah, I'd rather play more depressing music."
Fourth Freaking Red Flag!
I think I am gonna pull the classic "projecting" excuse and just tell him that I'm not ready to be dating anyone right now, maybe putting that idea in his head will make him realize that he has a little ways to go before he is ready to "get out there" again.I feel a little guilty for being fortunate enough to be dating 3 (relatively great) guys and "one of my ones" is not among them.
To quote one of my favorite authors, "So it goes."
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